Being an Adult

For the past month I’ve been looking for a grown up job. I’ve been through retail, been a cashier at a pool, a lunch lady, and a dog sitter and nanny. As I’ve grown I’ve realized I love taking care of kids, and though I want to help those of us who suffer from mental illness, maybe I should have gone into education. It’s a thought that’s hard to face. Have I been wasting time and money? What is my true calling? Who am I supposed to be? You know, grown up questions.

I’m wrestling a migraine at the cop dogs house pet sitting. It was a dry month for pet sitting. I recently had an interview at a group home which went really well, in fact they want me to come in for a third interview, but it’s not the job for me. Why? There’s no way I can deal with the stressful responsibility of driving a bus of disabled people to places I’m not familiar with as one of my job duties.

So I keep looking for jobs. I can’t wait out until next spring to take my last class doing nothing. This is the age to start my career (26). I just got an opportunity to come interview for an autism school as a behavioral therapist. I feel like they’ll hire someone more experienced, but I would be proud to tell people that’s what I do if I were to be hired.

I even applied for a position as a seasonal zookeeper. With my anthropology background I feel like I have a small shot at the job. I’ve been daydreaming about preparing lunches for primates or cleaning up zebra poo after hours.

Aside from the nerve wracking job search and soul searching, I’ve been suffering emotionally without Seroquel. I’ve been off it about a month because I couldn’t afford it. Also, the dose wasn’t high enough anymore. It used to regulate my sleep, and eventually lost its effect. I’m dreading having to pay for a doctor’s visit this month, but I need to talk to her to get back on the mental health horse. I honestly feel like a zombie, and it’s put stress on my social life.

Friends, I hope you’re all doing better than I am, and I hope to report some more positive findings soon.

13 thoughts on “Being an Adult

  1. Wow, I feel like I understand totally about the Seroquel thing. I went off the Seroquel because of my job… it was making me too tired during shift work- just drunken or zombie like. I went off it and it really contributed to my relapse. That, plus other stuff. It’s hard to know what to do after that. Replace it? Do something else? It sounds like you have some cool job prospects ahead. That’s awesome. Keep at it! You’re headed in a great direction. Tough times don’t last forever πŸ™‚ And you should definitely be proud of your accomplishments and love your job. So happy for you. “Adult jobs” come with experience. You get an “in” and work at it as long as you can, put it on your resume, and then you’re set. You’ll get there! πŸ™‚

  2. I think we all at some point start to ask ourselves that question and some never receive an answer. I’d say follow your heart and where it leads while every now and then taking the council of your mind just to be safe. Good luck on the job search, I hope you find the answers you’re looking for. ^^

  3. I just want to take a moment to say a much-belated yet still-relevant β€œthank you” for following β€œA Way With Words.” My joy in writing is made more complete when people read what I’ve written (and even more when they respond).

    I write primarily about faith and mental illness, but am known to dabble in other subjects, stories, and even the occasional poem. If you have any requests, please let me know.

    I appreciate what you have going here, sharing your story of recovery. I pray you are blessed in your life and writing, as you are a blessing to others.

    • She’s rarely got samples of what I need, and when she does it’s not even a months supply so though I would love to take them, it’s so awful for me to go on and off meds again and again, the stupid body just does NOT like it!

  4. Best wishes on the job search, 17 years ago, my husband applied for a maintenance position at a school. Instead of getting that position he was a teacher’s aide for a special ed class. He was wonderful! Especially working with autistic children. He loved it. I wish he had pursued it further. I mention this, because he had no experience when he was hired. Just a passion for learning. πŸ™‚

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